








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 347 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 148 matches | ||
| Faceit | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2081 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,980 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3349 | 42% |
| Smokes | 1844 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1513 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1274 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $541,595 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 896 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fl0rc | 68% | 25 |
| #2 | fleshy | 55% | 137 |
| #3 | Razerinho | 53% | 130 |
| #4 | had1 | 51% | 82 |
| #5 | anzetovitch | 51% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Razerinho | 53% | 130 |
| #4 | had1 | 51% | 82 |
| #5 | anzetovitch | 51% | 43 |
| #6 | dr. hssnd | 51% | 63 |
| #7 | staRty | 48% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fleshy | 6 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | Razerinho | 5 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | had1 | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | staRty | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | dr. hssnd | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | had1 | 311 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #2 | fleshy | 277 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #3 | Razerinho | 223 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #4 | dr. hssnd | 163 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #5 | staRty | 156 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | had1 | +3.20 | 84 | 72 |
| #2 | Fl0rc | +2.19 | 76 | 66 |
| #3 | NEKU | +0.62 | 81 | 66 |
| #4 | Razerinho | +0.11 | 34 | 60 |
| #5 | dr. hssnd | -0.74 | 67 | 63 |





