








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 286 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 29 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1012 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,543 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1163 | 33% |
| Smokes | 486 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 846 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1048 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $425,322 of utility $176 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 117 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Jaakylmakameli | 56% | 9 |
| #7 | ♿_Niksu_♿ | 54% | 13 |
| #8 | Abdullarahman | 51% | 55 |
| #9 | kippo^ ez.org | 43% | 7 |
| #10 | twitch.tv/thespooky27 | 14% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Abdullarahman | 8 | 0.0072 |
| #2 | kybe | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | romp | 1 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | ItzMqss | 1 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | twitch.tv/thespooky27 | 1 | 0.0068 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kybe | 99 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #2 | Na1L | 95 | 0.27 | 3 min |
| #3 | romp | 75 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #4 | Abdullarahman | 55 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | ItzMqss | 53 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ItzMqss | +6.49 | 85 | 63 |
| #2 | kippo^ ez.org | +6.30 | 83 | 72 |
| #3 | Na1L | +1.51 | 56 | 71 |
| #4 | Abdullarahman | +1.50 | 85 | 64 |
| #5 | romp | +1.12 | 52 | 64 |





