








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 130 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 179 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2011 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,988 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1297 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1673 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1535 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1483 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $442,729 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kenzo | 46% | 61 |
| #2 | Robbi | 46% | 24 |
| #3 | sphexxy | 43% | 158 |
| #4 | limeseN | 39% | 122 |
| #5 | victor | 37% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | sphexxy | 43% | 158 |
| #4 | limeseN | 39% | 122 |
| #5 | victor | 37% | 41 |
| #6 | L A P A ?!? | 36% | 25 |
| #7 | HjallaPenos | 35% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | limeseN | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #2 | sphexxy | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #3 | L A P A ?!? | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | limeseN | 358 | 0.13 | 11 min |
| #2 | sphexxy | 183 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #3 | victor | 113 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #4 | HjallaPenos | 110 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | Robbi | 94 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | L A P A ?!? | +1.61 | 93 | 68 |
| #2 | victor | +1.35 | 87 | 67 |
| #3 | limeseN | +0.99 | 83 | 72 |
| #4 | CURSEDXD | +0.92 | 87 | 60 |
| #5 | Kenzo | -0.19 | 85 | 58 |





