








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 139 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 96 matches | ||
| Premier | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1150 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,368 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 901 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1300 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1103 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1064 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $476,970 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 47 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | A1 | 64% | 11 |
| #2 | Saiko | 63% | 8 |
| #3 | JeTFet | 47% | 19 |
| #4 | victor | 45% | 42 |
| #5 | sphexxy | 45% | 94 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | victor | 45% | 42 |
| #5 | sphexxy | 45% | 94 |
| #6 | limeseN | 38% | 68 |
| #7 | Kenzo | 36% | 22 |
| #8 | CURSEDXD | 35% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JeTFet | 3 | 0.0090 |
| #2 | sphexxy | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | CURSEDXD | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | A1 | 1 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | Saiko | 1 | 0.0059 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | limeseN | 241 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #2 | victor | 119 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #3 | sphexxy | 116 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #4 | CURSEDXD | 110 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | JeTFet | 46 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | A1 | +2.14 | 81 | 77 |
| #2 | victor | +2.09 | 90 | 66 |
| #3 | JeTFet | +1.71 | 84 | 69 |
| #4 | limeseN | +1.50 | 84 | 71 |
| #5 | CURSEDXD | +0.85 | 84 | 61 |





