








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 507 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 29 matches | ||
| Wingman | 25 matches | ||
| Faceit | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 65 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3015 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,336 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2925 | 28% |
| Smokes | 3610 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 1798 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 2003 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,213,885 of utility $185 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 24 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ceptoplex | 67% | 21 |
| #2 | Holy_sheep | 61% | 18 |
| #3 | TheLoyalldo | 60% | 55 |
| #4 | Pickup | 56% | 73 |
| #5 | KaGi | 55% | 107 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KaGi | 5 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | dyrL | 4 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | marf :)))) | 2 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | fysiX | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Pickup | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fysiX | +2.65 | 76 | 69 |
| #2 | 「Insanity」Jenslyツ | +2.09 | 61 | 79 |
| #3 | marf :)))) | +1.94 | 87 | 63 |
| #4 | '.ZioN | +1.39 | 69 | 65 |
| #5 | KaGi | +0.81 | 67 | 73 |





