








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 200 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 39 matches | ||
| Premier | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 22 matches | ||
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




96 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2428 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,158 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2922 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3417 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2212 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2607 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $454,999 of utility $75 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 285 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Playmaker | 71% | 24 |
| #2 | Moneymaker | 67% | 24 |
| #3 | Karvainen Igor | 65% | 49 |
| #4 | TK | 65% | 17 |
| #5 | HappyFeet | 64% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | ToxicWaste 速度 | 63% | 19 |
| #7 | tomas selbi sigma | 58% | 122 |
| #8 | Gunár💜 | 57% | 208 |
| #9 | MvS | 55% | 49 |
| #10 | Pelihirmu | 54% | 96 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gunár💜 | 74 | 0.0185 |
| #2 | Pelihirmu | 39 | 0.0210 |
| #3 | MvS | 34 | 0.0351 |
| #4 | tomas selbi sigma | 25 | 0.0107 |
| #5 | HappyFeet | 19 | 0.0297 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gunár💜 | 422 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #2 | tomas selbi sigma | 368 | 0.16 | 10 min |
| #3 | Pelihirmu | 226 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #4 | MvS | 136 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #5 | Karvainen Igor | 116 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ToxicWaste 速度 | +3.92 | 79 | 27 |
| #2 | tomas selbi sigma | +2.59 | 74 | 68 |
| #3 | Moneymaker | +2.54 | 64 | 71 |
| #4 | MvS | +2.42 | 80 | 44 |
| #5 | TK | +1.95 | 48 | 59 |





