








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 373 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 233 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 101 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 35 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




122 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4934 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,691 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3905 | 22% |
| Smokes | 4966 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 5008 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 3812 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,699,712 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 103 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kallevi "Kash" Heiskanen | 57% | 208 |
| #2 | tomas selbi sigma | 53% | 493 |
| 51% | 35 | ||
| #4 | Pelihirmu | 49% | 47 |
| #5 | Karvainen Igor | 49% | 101 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kallevi "Kash" Heiskanen | 57% | 208 |
| #2 | tomas selbi sigma | 53% | 493 |
| 51% | 35 | ||
| #4 | Pelihirmu | 49% | 47 |
| #5 | Karvainen Igor | 49% | 101 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kallevi "Kash" Heiskanen | 67 | 0.0168 |
| #2 | tomas selbi sigma | 54 | 0.0055 |
| #3 | Pelihirmu | 17 | 0.0189 |
| #4 | Karvainen Igor | 9 | 0.0045 |
| 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tomas selbi sigma | 1237 | 0.13 | 36 min |
| #2 | Kallevi "Kash" Heiskanen | 576 | 0.14 | 14 min |
| #3 | Karvainen Igor | 199 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | Pelihirmu | 118 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| 56 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tomas selbi sigma | +1.92 | 75 | 71 |
| #2 | Pelihirmu | +0.77 | 50 | 55 |
| #3 | Gunár💜 | -0.07 | 58 | 69 |
| #4 | Kallevi "Kash" Heiskanen | -0.19 | 52 | 67 |
| -0.81 | 67 | 52 |





