








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2748 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 643 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 535 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 86 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




132 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
12492 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 48,647 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 20051 | 41% |
| Smokes | 10904 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 9221 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 8471 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,726,547 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1896 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sliverplay | 74% | 77 |
| #2 | ★ yungmac | 74% | 88 |
| #3 | Lemonnnnnnnnnnnnnnn | 73% | 75 |
| #4 | ☪ Wandrew Wate | 71% | 143 |
| #5 | pikabo0o0 | 70% | 290 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | ☪ Wandrew Wate | 71% | 143 |
| #5 | pikabo0o0 | 70% | 290 |
| #6 | Axire | 68% | 95 |
| #7 | Yves | 66% | 243 |
| #8 | GioW | 61% | 330 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pikabo0o0 | 26 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | Yves | 15 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | ☪ Wandrew Wate | 15 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | GioW | 14 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Axire | 11 | 0.0056 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yves | 811 | 0.16 | 21 min |
| #2 | ☪ Wandrew Wate | 533 | 0.19 | 14 min |
| #3 | Axire | 280 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #4 | Lemonnnnnnnnnnnnnnn | 254 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #5 | GioW | 235 | 0.04 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ★ yungmac | +4.33 | 84 | 52 |
| #2 | sliverplay | +4.10 | 87 | 53 |
| #3 | ☪ Wandrew Wate | +3.82 | 84 | 58 |
| #4 | GioW | +2.37 | 82 | 24 |
| #5 | Yves | +2.28 | 63 | 62 |





