








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 90 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
867 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,503 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 305 | 20% |
| Smokes | 623 | 41% |
| HE Grenades | 303 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 272 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $321,634 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Andersn★ | 50% | 20 |
| #6 | jrN | 47% | 19 |
| #7 | Eriksen | 47% | 110 |
| #8 | Skruffe | 47% | 62 |
| #9 | Chelbo | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eriksen | 6 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | Petter Lars | 3 | 0.0098 |
| #3 | Lars Petter | 2 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skruffe | 210 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #2 | Eriksen | 67 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #3 | Lars Petter | 47 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | jrN | 35 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | qern | 34 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Petter Lars | +5.00 | 89 | 67 |
| #2 | jrN | +4.26 | 87 | 51 |
| #3 | Lars Petter | +2.36 | 82 | 65 |
| #4 | qern | +1.65 | 83 | 58 |
| #5 | Eriksen | +1.38 | 68 | 50 |





