








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 628 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 334 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2598 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,343 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2350 | 19% |
| Smokes | 3861 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2282 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 3850 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,912,358 of utility $232 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 560 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Krzyz | 70% | 23 |
| #2 | Biotic | 66% | 160 |
| #3 | CompleX | 65% | 101 |
| #4 | Sundis | 64% | 39 |
| #5 | Marluxia | 62% | 101 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | skeewox | 54% | 26 |
| #12 | ryAn | 52% | 63 |
| #13 | Tris | 50% | 66 |
| #14 | Dynasty | 48% | 52 |
| #15 | BooCull | 48% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mantissa | 9 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | Biotic | 5 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Incipiens | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | drewpie | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | BeastLeor | 3 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mantissa | 630 | 0.17 | 20 min |
| #2 | Biotic | 448 | 0.12 | 12 min |
| #3 | Marluxia | 349 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #4 | CompleX | 183 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #5 | Incipiens | 170 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Krzyz | +3.87 | 75 | 70 |
| #2 | Marluxia | +3.32 | 75 | 70 |
| #3 | Sundis | +3.09 | 84 | 65 |
| #4 | Incipiens | +2.47 | 59 | 66 |
| #5 | Mantissa | +1.60 | 59 | 75 |





