








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 12 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 133 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1587 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,515 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1446 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1676 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1597 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1796 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $341,432 of utility $89 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 11 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LaGrosseMIte | 59% | 22 |
| #2 | Joueur 1 | 53% | 17 |
| #3 | Mague RothQueu | 52% | 27 |
| #4 | Lt armEL | 50% | 10 |
| #5 | TheAldorayne | 48% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Lumenex | 47% | 77 |
| #7 | Le J. | 43% | 51 |
| #8 | Napo | 36% | 11 |
| #9 | Wolf | 31% | 13 |
| #10 | KCDQ jr | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Le J. | 6 | 0.0058 |
| #2 | Lumenex | 4 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | LaGrosseMIte | 4 | 0.0093 |
| #4 | Mague RothQueu | 3 | 0.0054 |
| #5 | TheAldorayne | 2 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lumenex | 232 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #2 | Le J. | 202 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #3 | Mague RothQueu | 102 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #4 | Joueur 1 | 81 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #5 | Napo | 79 | 0.32 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joueur 1 | +2.26 | 86 | 80 |
| #2 | Lumenex | +0.55 | 56 | 65 |
| #3 | Napo | +0.50 | 78 | 66 |
| #4 | Tirf-S | +0.23 | 64 | 59 |
| #5 | Le J. | -0.01 | 73 | 75 |





