








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 31 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 145 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




63 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1167 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,934 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 630 | 11% |
| Smokes | 904 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 2082 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 2318 | 39% |
Our logs show you have wasted $201,760 of utility $32 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 13 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | LizzyBear | 50% | 18 |
| #3 | Rudacless | 46% | 61 |
| #4 | Zyphos | 44% | 248 |
| #5 | baba tunde | 43% | 181 |
| #6 | Xaelynn | 42% | 289 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zyphos | 414 | 0.09 | 10 min |
| #2 | baba tunde | 231 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #3 | Xaelynn | 107 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| #4 | Rudacless | 19 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #5 | LizzyBear | 14 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | baba tunde | +5.37 | 62 | 43 |
| #2 | Zyphos | +3.45 | 58 | 54 |
| #3 | Rudacless | +0.00 | 19 | 35 |
| #4 | LizzyBear | -0.45 | 21 | 34 |
| #5 | Xaelynn | -3.08 | 20 | 21 |





