








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 134 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 51 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
745 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,492 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 292 | 20% |
| Smokes | 290 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 408 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 502 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $166,760 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 63 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vale | 67% | 3 |
| #2 | pIčUs | 67% | 3 |
| #3 | PAPA MUNTZ | 67% | 3 |
| #4 | šikn | 67% | 9 |
| #5 | ToXeb | 67% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | CHabiP NuRmakedomov | 50% | 14 |
| #12 | hλnnah | 38% | 8 |
| #13 | ejg | 33% | 3 |
| #14 | PrometheuS | 33% | 6 |
| #15 | GrOgY | 0% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ejg | 1 | 0.0159 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nsnsnsns | 105 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| #2 | BOMBARDiAN | 103 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #3 | ToXeb | 46 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | šikn | 45 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #5 | CHabiP NuRmakedomov | 42 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KENNY | +3.49 | 96 | 52 |
| #2 | GrOgY | +2.50 | 86 | 68 |
| #3 | n | +2.08 | 95 | 62 |
| #4 | ToXeb | +1.89 | 77 | 60 |
| #5 | vale | +0.94 | 69 | 41 |





