








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 167 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 165 matches | ||
| Faceit | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3202 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,904 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4337 | 29% |
| Smokes | 4031 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3115 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3421 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $441,285 of utility $71 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 19 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ATi ︻デ 一 | 63% | 24 |
| #2 | drink | 59% | 58 |
| #3 | Swe_ex | 56% | 167 |
| #4 | dagnar | 55% | 123 |
| #5 | KingAkashi | 54% | 197 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | sqpremes | 53% | 17 |
| #10 | PsihinisLigonis | 52% | 118 |
| #11 | Linkolini | 50% | 123 |
| #12 | sTƐaMy | 50% | 72 |
| #13 | Paulino | 40% | 57 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Swe_ex | 10 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | KingAkashi | 7 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | PsihinisLigonis | 5 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | Linkolini | 5 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | dagnar | 3 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Swe_ex | 635 | 0.18 | 15 min |
| #2 | Linkolini | 500 | 0.20 | 14 min |
| #3 | dagnar | 352 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #4 | KingAkashi | 329 | 0.08 | 9 min |
| #5 | PsihinisLigonis | 298 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xander | +3.04 | 83 | 76 |
| #2 | D4 | +1.35 | 77 | 64 |
| #3 | _Molokko | +0.85 | 70 | 73 |
| #4 | Swe_ex | +0.28 | 68 | 63 |
| #5 | KingAkashi | -0.06 | 66 | 59 |





