








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 10 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 89 matches | ||
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2167 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,297 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1911 | 36% |
| Smokes | 1147 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 808 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 1431 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $439,024 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 82 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Voltz | 69% | 65 |
| #2 | Ratmeat | 68% | 62 |
| #3 | KINGV3RSACE | 65% | 95 |
| #4 | 65roses | 61% | 41 |
| #5 | Dank | 54% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Voltz | 69% | 65 |
| #2 | Ratmeat | 68% | 62 |
| #3 | KINGV3RSACE | 65% | 95 |
| #4 | 65roses | 61% | 41 |
| #5 | Dank | 54% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Voltz | 5 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | 65roses | 5 | 0.0060 |
| #3 | KINGV3RSACE | 4 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | Ratmeat | 3 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dank | 227 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #2 | 65roses | 226 | 0.27 | 5 min |
| #3 | KINGV3RSACE | 209 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #4 | Voltz | 207 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #5 | Ratmeat | 172 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Voltz | +3.31 | 91 | 64 |
| #2 | Futxbol | +2.29 | 72 | 60 |
| #3 | 65roses | +1.95 | 88 | 58 |
| #4 | Dank | -0.15 | 69 | 53 |
| #5 | KINGV3RSACE | -1.18 | 70 | 53 |





