








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 486 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 120 matches | ||
| Faceit | 102 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3909 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,328 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3991 | 35% |
| Smokes | 3110 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2067 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2160 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $380,492 of utility $66 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1320 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KINGV3RSACE | 64% | 14 |
| #2 | Futxbol | 61% | 41 |
| #3 | different | 52% | 73 |
| #4 | Harry Ballsonya | 50% | 38 |
| #5 | gnf | 46% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Futxbol | 61% | 41 |
| #3 | different | 52% | 73 |
| #4 | Harry Ballsonya | 50% | 38 |
| #5 | gnf | 46% | 28 |
| #6 | 5318008 | 44% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | different | 6 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | Harry Ballsonya | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | gnf | 1 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | KINGV3RSACE | 1 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | different | 219 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #2 | Harry Ballsonya | 161 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #3 | Futxbol | 109 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #4 | gnf | 47 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | 5318008 | 32 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 65roses | +2.79 | 89 | 61 |
| #2 | different | +1.56 | 68 | 69 |
| #3 | Futxbol | +0.73 | 66 | 56 |
| #4 | gnf | -0.67 | 76 | 47 |
| #5 | KINGV3RSACE | -0.80 | 81 | 48 |





