








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 283 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 201 matches | ||
| Faceit | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3701 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,067 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2762 | 21% |
| Smokes | 3318 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3405 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3582 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $679,526 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 43 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | lbrakadabra- | 64% | 88 |
| #4 | Schnegge_V3 | 62% | 29 |
| #5 | Morrtis nV | 58% | 33 |
| #6 | Sparkyy | 56% | 18 |
| #7 | aphextwin | 54% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lbrakadabra- | 240 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #2 | Schnegge_V3 | 85 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | aphextwin | 76 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | Morrtis nV | 71 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | Sparkyy | 65 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aphextwin | +1.60 | 77 | 65 |
| #2 | Schnegge_V3 | +1.16 | 65 | 73 |
| #3 | Sparkyy | +0.89 | 79 | 69 |
| #4 | Paix | +0.88 | 85 | 68 |
| #5 | lbrakadabra- | +0.67 | 83 | 78 |





