








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 235 matches | ||
| Premier | 155 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




47 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4890 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,615 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2211 | 19% |
| Smokes | 3596 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 3209 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2599 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,546,270 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 76 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | austincs_ | 62% | 63 |
| #2 | Spoody | 60% | 55 |
| #3 | Branco | 57% | 82 |
| #4 | Vojnik Armir | 55% | 42 |
| #5 | Skvatnan | 53% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Vojnik Armir | 55% | 42 |
| #5 | Skvatnan | 53% | 43 |
| #6 | pasta booth | 51% | 209 |
| #7 | bobenheimer | 50% | 214 |
| #8 | Fewwi | 48% | 155 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pasta booth | 35 | 0.0079 |
| #2 | Spoody | 27 | 0.0237 |
| #3 | bobenheimer | 8 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | austincs_ | 8 | 0.0063 |
| #5 | Fewwi | 4 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pasta booth | 702 | 0.16 | 15 min |
| #2 | Fewwi | 547 | 0.16 | 12 min |
| #3 | bobenheimer | 284 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #4 | austincs_ | 263 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #5 | Spoody | 184 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | austincs_ | +4.42 | 86 | 66 |
| #2 | lake michigan | +2.14 | 82 | 58 |
| #3 | Skvatnan | +1.14 | 61 | 56 |
| #4 | Spoody | +1.08 | 81 | 62 |
| #5 | bobenheimer | +0.76 | 61 | 64 |





