








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 110 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 64 matches | ||
| Wingman | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1596 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,268 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1927 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1623 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1527 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1191 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $70,969 of utility $26 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 44 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vojnik Armir | 65% | 20 |
| #2 | lake michigan | 62% | 63 |
| #3 | bobenheimer | 58% | 64 |
| #4 | Branco | 52% | 31 |
| #5 | meLLe | 50% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | pasta booth | 48% | 126 |
| #7 | Fewwi | 47% | 34 |
| #8 | Hogwarts | 44% | 9 |
| #9 | Spoody | 39% | 23 |
| #10 | Skvatnan | 35% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pasta booth | 27 | 0.0109 |
| #2 | Spoody | 14 | 0.0323 |
| #3 | lake michigan | 11 | 0.0087 |
| #4 | Vojnik Armir | 4 | 0.0101 |
| #5 | bobenheimer | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pasta booth | 419 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #2 | Fewwi | 91 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #3 | Spoody | 91 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #4 | bobenheimer | 88 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | lake michigan | 72 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | austincs_ | +4.88 | 90 | 63 |
| #2 | lake michigan | +1.74 | 79 | 56 |
| #3 | Skvatnan | +0.06 | 63 | 49 |
| #4 | meLLe | -0.12 | 72 | 63 |
| #5 | bobenheimer | -0.53 | 57 | 64 |





