








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2172 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 857 matches | ||
| Faceit | 380 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




67 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
15679 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 47,910 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 18089 | 38% |
| Smokes | 12199 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 5933 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 11689 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,444,615 of utility $153 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2437 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | prospekt | 65% | 205 |
| #2 | nova | 63% | 78 |
| #3 | roboscob | 62% | 248 |
| #4 | Stewie2Dads | 61% | 207 |
| #5 | MON | 61% | 94 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | eekum bokum | 55% | 139 |
| #8 | pZ | 55% | 188 |
| #9 | Jax | 55% | 116 |
| #10 | ThEScOoP | 55% | 147 |
| #11 | warpN | 52% | 89 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J13K | 51 | 0.0061 |
| #2 | ThEScOoP | 28 | 0.0098 |
| #3 | roboscob | 15 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | prospekt | 12 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | pZ | 8 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J13K | 1837 | 0.22 | 50 min |
| #2 | Stewie2Dads | 922 | 0.21 | 21 min |
| #3 | eekum bokum | 653 | 0.23 | 18 min |
| #4 | prospekt | 590 | 0.13 | 14 min |
| #5 | pZ | 584 | 0.15 | 16 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | roboscob | +2.04 | 81 | 57 |
| #2 | MON | +1.67 | 78 | 59 |
| #3 | J13K | +1.64 | 85 | 67 |
| #4 | prospekt | +1.64 | 67 | 60 |
| #5 | nova | +1.44 | 70 | 63 |





