








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 348 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 153 matches | ||
| Premier | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3910 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,969 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2604 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3162 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1496 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 2707 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $919,516 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 185 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MON | 67% | 18 |
| #2 | prospekt | 64% | 53 |
| #3 | roboscob | 58% | 78 |
| #4 | Stewie2Dads | 57% | 69 |
| #5 | TOP50OWEN | 55% | 188 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | eekum bokum | 53% | 75 |
| #9 | -Inigmah- | 53% | 19 |
| #10 | Coffee | 52% | 85 |
| #11 | atomic | 47% | 32 |
| #12 | warpN | 43% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J13K | 7 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Coffee | 6 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | prospekt | 6 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | TOP50OWEN | 4 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | Jax | 4 | 0.0051 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TOP50OWEN | 879 | 0.22 | 22 min |
| #2 | J13K | 572 | 0.26 | 14 min |
| #3 | eekum bokum | 399 | 0.26 | 10 min |
| #4 | Stewie2Dads | 326 | 0.22 | 8 min |
| #5 | prospekt | 156 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | prospekt | +2.54 | 69 | 61 |
| #2 | -Inigmah- | +2.21 | 84 | 47 |
| #3 | roboscob | +2.04 | 79 | 54 |
| #4 | MON | +1.98 | 74 | 57 |
| #5 | J13K | +1.28 | 80 | 70 |





