








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 141 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 24 matches | ||
| Premier | 11 matches | ||
| Esplay | 7 matches | 2,214 |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
982 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,825 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1116 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1015 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 768 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 926 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $122,469 of utility $77 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 193 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | KralleJ | 46% | 24 |
| #10 | Borsty | 46% | 35 |
| #11 | xdpiratmanden * 3F | 43% | 7 |
| #12 | RasmusAS | 43% | 28 |
| #13 | anderizzle | 0% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Borsty | 10 | 0.0136 |
| #2 | KralleJ | 8 | 0.0152 |
| #3 | RasmusAS | 5 | 0.0082 |
| #4 | nikotini-_- | 2 | 0.0160 |
| #5 | Zaq | 2 | 0.0185 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nolife | +6.19 | 85 | 50 |
| #2 | KralleJ | +3.86 | 92 | 67 |
| #3 | Borsty | +1.62 | 80 | 56 |
| #4 | Zaq | +1.52 | 87 | 21 |
| #5 | blAmse | +1.27 | 82 | 76 |





