








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 142 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Esplay | 18 matches | 2,143 | |
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
412 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,870 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 458 | 24% |
| Smokes | 448 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 511 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 453 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $115,199 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 78 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Xywzz | 63% | 8 |
| #5 | RasmusAS | 56% | 25 |
| #6 | blAmse | 56% | 18 |
| #7 | Borsty | 55% | 33 |
| #8 | Zaq | 40% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Borsty | 9 | 0.0140 |
| #2 | KralleJ | 5 | 0.0164 |
| #3 | RasmusAS | 3 | 0.0063 |
| #4 | Zaq | 3 | 0.0390 |
| #5 | blAmse | 2 | 0.0057 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KralleJ | 80 | 0.26 | 3 min |
| #2 | blAmse | 77 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #3 | Borsty | 70 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #4 | RasmusAS | 50 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | Xywzz | 45 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KralleJ | +5.42 | 93 | 74 |
| #2 | Zaq | +4.63 | 75 | 50 |
| #3 | Borsty | +2.67 | 81 | 59 |
| #4 | blAmse | +1.76 | 81 | 77 |
| #5 | Xywzz | +0.89 | 68 | 63 |





