








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1234 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 33 matches | ||
| Faceit | 25 matches | ||
| Premier | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 31 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3992 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,045 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4780 | 34% |
| Smokes | 4273 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1613 | 11% |
| Molotovs | 3379 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $842,931 of utility $118 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 488 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yalenzz | 78% | 40 |
| #2 | gadget hackwrench | 77% | 31 |
| #3 | Steba | 65% | 111 |
| #4 | thiefy | 60% | 25 |
| #5 | Chazz | 58% | 92 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Steba | 65% | 111 |
| #4 | thiefy | 60% | 25 |
| #5 | Chazz | 58% | 92 |
| #6 | ezkillZ | 57% | 68 |
| #7 | chuie1121 | 45% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Steba | 9 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | Chazz | 8 | 0.0044 |
| #3 | chuie1121 | 4 | 0.0045 |
| #4 | gadget hackwrench | 2 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Steba | 463 | 0.21 | 11 min |
| #2 | Chazz | 321 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #3 | ezkillZ | 176 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #4 | gadget hackwrench | 176 | 0.28 | 4 min |
| #5 | yalenzz | 134 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ethanschaner | +6.00 | 87 | 71 |
| #2 | yalenzz | +3.10 | 73 | 75 |
| #3 | ezkillZ | +1.39 | 68 | 61 |
| #4 | thiefy | +1.19 | 70 | 50 |
| #5 | Steba | +1.19 | 74 | 61 |





