








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1340 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 95 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Premier | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 52 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




43 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6793 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,827 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6382 | 32% |
| Smokes | 5449 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3329 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 4667 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,522,473 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 528 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ethanschaner | 65% | 111 |
| #2 | ezkillZ | 55% | 339 |
| #3 | Chazz | 53% | 334 |
| #4 | chuie1121 | 52% | 233 |
| #5 | Mr. Killer | 48% | 111 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | ezkillZ | 55% | 339 |
| #3 | Chazz | 53% | 334 |
| #4 | chuie1121 | 52% | 233 |
| #5 | Mr. Killer | 48% | 111 |
| #6 | Dangerous | 43% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chazz | 44 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | chuie1121 | 23 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | ezkillZ | 22 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | Mr. Killer | 15 | 0.0066 |
| #5 | ethanschaner | 5 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chazz | 1216 | 0.18 | 29 min |
| #2 | ezkillZ | 909 | 0.13 | 24 min |
| #3 | ethanschaner | 553 | 0.25 | 16 min |
| #4 | chuie1121 | 435 | 0.09 | 10 min |
| #5 | Mr. Killer | 413 | 0.18 | 12 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ethanschaner | +6.64 | 88 | 76 |
| #2 | ezkillZ | +2.06 | 68 | 60 |
| #3 | Steba | +2.04 | 77 | 60 |
| #4 | Chazz | -0.78 | 50 | 55 |
| #5 | Mr. Killer | -1.33 | 52 | 64 |





