








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 548 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 190 matches | ||
| Premier | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3492 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,160 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1088 | 18% |
| Smokes | 1909 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1015 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 2148 | 35% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,627,453 of utility $232 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 110 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SharkFly | 67% | 24 |
| #2 | Pickers | 64% | 58 |
| #3 | 2w1ce | 63% | 56 |
| #4 | zCBN5zz | 57% | 122 |
| #5 | ~Wolfy~ | 53% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zCBN5zz | 711 | 0.28 | 20 min |
| #2 | LifesizePenguin | 606 | 0.24 | 13 min |
| #3 | Samboucaaa | 265 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #4 | 2w1ce | 103 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | Pickers | 97 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Psychopomp | +2.18 | 83 | 44 |
| #2 | zCBN5zz | +0.19 | 74 | 70 |
| #3 | SharkFly | +0.07 | 67 | 62 |
| #4 | Pickers | -0.10 | 62 | 45 |
| #5 | 2w1ce | -0.63 | 82 | 46 |





