








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 6 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 299 matches | ||
| Premier | 163 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4453 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,099 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4687 | 36% |
| Smokes | 3404 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2165 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 2843 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,703,456 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1920 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | christian | 56% | 50 |
| #2 | DrippieWhit | 56% | 34 |
| #3 | Brockington | 54% | 79 |
| #4 | i am kai | 50% | 68 |
| #5 | woody | 50% | 127 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Brockington | 54% | 79 |
| #4 | i am kai | 50% | 68 |
| #5 | woody | 50% | 127 |
| #6 | Justin Trudeau | 49% | 51 |
| #7 | gr4y | 48% | 201 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | i am kai | 5 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | gr4y | 4 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | woody | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Brockington | 3 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | christian | 3 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gr4y | 1026 | 0.27 | 24 min |
| #2 | woody | 682 | 0.27 | 15 min |
| #3 | Brockington | 406 | 0.25 | 10 min |
| #4 | Justin Trudeau | 324 | 0.29 | 8 min |
| #5 | christian | 149 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | woody | +2.46 | 87 | 64 |
| #2 | gr4y | +1.46 | 72 | 60 |
| #3 | Brockington | +1.34 | 64 | 63 |
| #4 | christian | +1.04 | 71 | 57 |
| #5 | i am kai | +0.52 | 69 | 53 |





