








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 256 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 258 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2889 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,319 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3297 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2929 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2503 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2590 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,000,517 of utility $150 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 39 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sp1mple | 52% | 157 |
| #2 | Mutsis¨ | 52% | 92 |
| #3 | Aak9x | 52% | 64 |
| #4 | Rekkuli | 48% | 277 |
| #5 | pppfffhhh | 47% | 242 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | pppfffhhh | 47% | 242 |
| #6 | Sn1g | 45% | 33 |
| #7 | Homo Kellari | 42% | 19 |
| #8 | Nahka | 40% | 107 |
| #9 | Zorj1 | 35% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pppfffhhh | 10 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | Rekkuli | 5 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | Nahka | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | Sp1mple | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | Mutsis¨ | 2 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rekkuli | 908 | 0.16 | 20 min |
| #2 | pppfffhhh | 888 | 0.17 | 24 min |
| #3 | Aak9x | 283 | 0.21 | 9 min |
| #4 | Sp1mple | 215 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #5 | Mutsis¨ | 206 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aak9x | +1.50 | 79 | 70 |
| #2 | Rekkuli | +1.14 | 74 | 67 |
| #3 | pppfffhhh | +0.92 | 58 | 77 |
| #4 | Sp1mple | +0.49 | 58 | 64 |
| #5 | Konrad | -0.25 | 75 | 68 |





