








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 665 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 63 matches | ||
| Premier | 60 matches | ||
| Faceit | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 57 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




69 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7089 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,274 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6214 | 34% |
| Smokes | 4392 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3218 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 4450 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,539,061 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 661 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grave | 81% | 43 |
| #2 | kraytos | 81% | 32 |
| #3 | salty pancakes | 78% | 36 |
| #4 | Bunny | 74% | 111 |
| #5 | nguyen | 73% | 89 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nguyen | 17 | 0.0095 |
| #2 | jchancE | 16 | 0.0085 |
| #3 | kita | 16 | 0.0129 |
| #4 | Bunny | 13 | 0.0059 |
| #5 | Champ | 13 | 0.0063 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 'WaterMelonCrusher' | 421 | 0.32 | 8 min |
| #2 | Bunny | 377 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #3 | Champ | 333 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #4 | nguyen | 330 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #5 | Mexican__KIRBYY | 302 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jchancE | +5.13 | 85 | 59 |
| #2 | seb-a-licious | +4.28 | 84 | 68 |
| #3 | Grave | +3.42 | 82 | 57 |
| #4 | Bunny | +3.35 | 79 | 66 |
| #5 | Champ | +2.81 | 84 | 54 |





