








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 361 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 292 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2565 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,678 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4766 | 41% |
| Smokes | 2828 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2847 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1237 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $934,655 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 46 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moori | 60% | 20 |
| #2 | F1nven | 57% | 44 |
| #3 | Player | 57% | 23 |
| #4 | D-Law66.シノゲカイ | 53% | 32 |
| #5 | ⭕⃤ ʍʏɦօʀռʏʊռƈʟɛ- | 53% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | ⭕⃤ ʍʏɦօʀռʏʊռƈʟɛ- | 53% | 17 |
| #6 | Ɗєᴠᴠє ƤƖαуєя ❦ | 53% | 78 |
| #7 | DanteMav | 49% | 57 |
| #8 | Ɗαяк_Oяcнєѕтяα ❦ | 48% | 27 |
| #9 | DarkeLord | 45% | 106 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ɗєᴠᴠє ƤƖαуєя ❦ | 7 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | D-Law66.シノゲカイ | 4 | 0.0055 |
| #3 | DarkeLord | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | Player | 3 | 0.0060 |
| #5 | DanteMav | 2 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DarkeLord | 493 | 0.22 | 12 min |
| #2 | Ɗєᴠᴠє ƤƖαуєя ❦ | 429 | 0.26 | 9 min |
| #3 | D-Law66.シノゲカイ | 201 | 0.28 | 5 min |
| #4 | DanteMav | 191 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #5 | Player | 124 | 0.25 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Player | +5.70 | 81 | 70 |
| #2 | Ɗєᴠᴠє ƤƖαуєя ❦ | +5.27 | 82 | 69 |
| #3 | Ɗαяк_Oяcнєѕтяα ❦ | +1.79 | 64 | 67 |
| #4 | DarkeLord | +1.13 | 63 | 69 |
| #5 | D-Law66.シノゲカイ | +0.56 | 32 | 70 |





