








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 532 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Premier | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




48 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3299 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,259 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4699 | 33% |
| Smokes | 3417 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3309 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2834 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $804,220 of utility $111 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 857 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Log4n111 | 58% | 24 |
| #2 | MR-JACKPOT | 57% | 303 |
| #3 | Maximus | 57% | 199 |
| #4 | stu | 55% | 247 |
| #5 | moray | 54% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | MR-JACKPOT | 57% | 303 |
| #3 | Maximus | 57% | 199 |
| #4 | stu | 55% | 247 |
| #5 | moray | 54% | 24 |
| #6 | Hongus "Le'Fleur" Jr | 52% | 119 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MR-JACKPOT | 32 | 0.0057 |
| #2 | Maximus | 29 | 0.0076 |
| #3 | stu | 12 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | Hongus "Le'Fleur" Jr | 10 | 0.0047 |
| #5 | moray | 2 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MR-JACKPOT | 938 | 0.17 | 25 min |
| #2 | Maximus | 600 | 0.16 | 16 min |
| #3 | Hongus "Le'Fleur" Jr | 301 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #4 | stu | 300 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #5 | Log4n111 | 54 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MR-JACKPOT | +4.22 | 87 | 66 |
| #2 | Log4n111 | +1.64 | 71 | 48 |
| #3 | Maximus | +0.63 | 62 | 65 |
| #4 | oil | -0.43 | 76 | 59 |
| #5 | Hongus "Le'Fleur" Jr | -0.45 | 68 | 55 |





