








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 651 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 386 matches | ||
| Faceit | 20 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 83 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3886 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,992 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3485 | 18% |
| Smokes | 5184 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 6447 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 3876 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,292,361 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 51 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | johnny_8 | 59% | 27 |
| #2 | Larsomart | 56% | 32 |
| #3 | 4tFrag | hatyyy | 52% | 194 |
| #4 | R0biNbLy4t | 51% | 45 |
| #5 | okhi | 50% | 209 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | ♿Aimcrusher aka.phoon 1337♿ | 43% | 46 |
| #11 | fx_ | 42% | 26 |
| #12 | Thai-Ming | 42% | 36 |
| #13 | ℝ𝕪𝕚𝕒𝕙 | 41% | 41 |
| #14 | swgr | 39% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Drin ist der Win | 9 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | 4tFrag | hatyyy | 7 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | 𝘛𝘦𝘤𝘩𝘪 | 5 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | okhi | 3 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Larsomart | 2 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Drin ist der Win | 1198 | 0.13 | 29 min |
| #2 | 4tFrag | hatyyy | 711 | 0.17 | 21 min |
| #3 | `Vayra | 342 | 0.26 | 9 min |
| #4 | okhi | 308 | 0.07 | 10 min |
| #5 | 𝘛𝘦𝘤𝘩𝘪 | 185 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 4tFrag | hatyyy | +2.59 | 88 | 69 |
| #2 | okhi | +1.12 | 87 | 63 |
| #3 | `Vayra | +0.83 | 80 | 64 |
| #4 | ♿Aimcrusher aka.phoon 1337♿ | +0.37 | 87 | 74 |
| #5 | Larsomart | +0.31 | 79 | 61 |





