








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 908 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 305 matches | ||
| Faceit | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 74 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4911 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,275 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5532 | 30% |
| Smokes | 4652 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 4448 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3643 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,473,338 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 257 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ★ TeCci | 69% | 32 |
| #2 | ♿Aimcrusher aka.phoon 1337♿ | 59% | 123 |
| #3 | Entenfahrstuhl | 58% | 66 |
| #4 | R0biNbLy4t | 57% | 37 |
| #5 | okhi | 57% | 332 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | `Vayra | 55% | 101 |
| #7 | Drin ist der Win | 55% | 324 |
| #8 | 𝘛𝘦𝘤𝘩𝘪 | 54% | 24 |
| #9 | mxzeH | 52% | 194 |
| #10 | ℝ𝕪𝕚𝕒𝕙 | 52% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Drin ist der Win | 7 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | mxzeH | 6 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | okhi | 4 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | ℝ𝕪𝕚𝕒𝕙 | 3 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | ♿Aimcrusher aka.phoon 1337♿ | 2 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Drin ist der Win | 842 | 0.12 | 21 min |
| #2 | `Vayra | 495 | 0.24 | 13 min |
| #3 | okhi | 420 | 0.06 | 13 min |
| #4 | ♿Aimcrusher aka.phoon 1337♿ | 321 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #5 | Entenfahrstuhl | 303 | 0.21 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 4tFrag | hatyyy | +2.52 | 88 | 69 |
| #2 | ♿Aimcrusher aka.phoon 1337♿ | +1.51 | 87 | 67 |
| #3 | `Vayra | +0.83 | 79 | 65 |
| #4 | ★ TeCci | +0.58 | 75 | 78 |
| #5 | okhi | +0.54 | 86 | 63 |





