








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 163 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 110 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
879 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,808 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 411 | 15% |
| Smokes | 442 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 899 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1056 | 38% |
Our logs show you have wasted $797,956 of utility $265 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 240 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | DoggoneAtom2568 | 43% | 42 |
| #9 | pierre | 42% | 57 |
| #10 | griddy hitter 9000 | 38% | 29 |
| #11 | xsibord | 30% | 10 |
| #12 | Virginia Beach | 29% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Framton Nuttel | 8 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | ductt4pek4v 6k | 7 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | pierre | 4 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | DoggoneAtom2568 | 4 | 0.0044 |
| #5 | Virginia Beach | 3 | 0.0066 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Framton Nuttel | 170 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #2 | ductt4pek4v 6k | 167 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #3 | lucky | 156 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #4 | pierre | 134 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #5 | DoggoneAtom2568 | 121 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DoggoneAtom2568 | +4.40 | 71 | 77 |
| #2 | yousef {luckchard} | +4.04 | 73 | 65 |
| #3 | lucky | +1.66 | 77 | 66 |
| #4 | Framton Nuttel | +1.31 | 79 | 49 |
| #5 | Charels | +0.28 | 56 | 66 |





