








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 65 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 230 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2123 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,014 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3253 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2823 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2082 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1856 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $325,292 of utility $49 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 71 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kevinryt | 57% | 23 |
| #2 | ⫍ ⃢ ⫎ Pancake | 50% | 135 |
| #3 | Titor | 50% | 18 |
| #4 | チルノ | 48% | 33 |
| #5 | Arabidopsis | 45% | 263 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | チルノ | 48% | 33 |
| #5 | Arabidopsis | 45% | 263 |
| #6 | TUBA | 44% | 177 |
| #7 | Rex | 38% | 39 |
| #8 | Sora Ginko | 26% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⫍ ⃢ ⫎ Pancake | 8 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | Rex | 5 | 0.0065 |
| #3 | TUBA | 4 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | Arabidopsis | 3 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | Titor | 2 | 0.0051 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Arabidopsis | 404 | 0.07 | 9 min |
| #2 | Rex | 236 | 0.31 | 6 min |
| #3 | ⫍ ⃢ ⫎ Pancake | 172 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #4 | Sora Ginko | 147 | 0.27 | 3 min |
| #5 | チルノ | 116 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | チルノ | +4.74 | 85 | 61 |
| #2 | Titor | +2.58 | 61 | 57 |
| #3 | kevinryt | +2.44 | 71 | 61 |
| #4 | Arabidopsis | +1.98 | 53 | 51 |
| #5 | Sora Ginko | +0.61 | 51 | 44 |





