








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 247 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 121 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 23 matches | ||
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4473 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,413 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1964 | 21% |
| Smokes | 2000 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 2448 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3001 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,158,743 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 39 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dault | 77% | 22 |
| #2 | kei | 59% | 37 |
| #3 | 鸡兽CHICKENBEAST | 59% | 64 |
| #4 | the pope <3 | 55% | 56 |
| #5 | toromi_ps | 53% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Darkpit | 8 | 0.0100 |
| #2 | dault | 7 | 0.0155 |
| #3 | the pope <3 | 6 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | maj | 6 | 0.0070 |
| #5 | scobes.jmg | 4 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | scobes.jmg | 284 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #2 | Jona | 170 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #3 | Darkpit | 153 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #4 | maj | 152 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #5 | toromi_ps | 131 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dault | +4.50 | 83 | 57 |
| #2 | maj | +2.11 | 79 | 63 |
| #3 | the pope <3 | +1.92 | 87 | 45 |
| #4 | toromi_ps | +1.31 | 80 | 63 |
| #5 | Gav | +1.29 | 66 | 44 |





