








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 311 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 94 matches | ||
| Faceit | 78 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 57 matches | ||
| Premier | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




61 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6382 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,014 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7746 | 37% |
| Smokes | 3410 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 4998 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4860 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,057,021 of utility $98 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 124 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | female boy | 58% | 214 |
| #2 | spank | 56% | 34 |
| #3 | Madi | 55% | 139 |
| #4 | rrr | 55% | 137 |
| #5 | Big Fella | 54% | 264 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Madi | 55% | 139 |
| #4 | rrr | 55% | 137 |
| #5 | Big Fella | 54% | 264 |
| #6 | アカリ・ワタナベ | 50% | 72 |
| #7 | tsunomakura | 50% | 76 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Madi | 43 | 0.0153 |
| #2 | female boy | 13 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | rrr | 13 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | tsunomakura | 13 | 0.0086 |
| #5 | Big Fella | 10 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | female boy | 640 | 0.14 | 16 min |
| #2 | Big Fella | 539 | 0.10 | 14 min |
| #3 | rrr | 477 | 0.18 | 11 min |
| #4 | Madi | 241 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #5 | tsunomakura | 213 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ゆかりん | +3.72 | 87 | 66 |
| #2 | Madi | +2.36 | 81 | 37 |
| #3 | female boy | +0.82 | 72 | 49 |
| #4 | tsunomakura | +0.69 | 80 | 48 |
| #5 | rrr | -0.01 | 83 | 50 |





