








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 793 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 142 matches | ||
| Wingman | 125 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 60 matches | ||
| Renown | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3288 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,761 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2249 | 33% |
| Smokes | 1907 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2000 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 605 | 9% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,054,953 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 485 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Donnie | 51% | 74 |
| #2 | UrMomGay | 50% | 222 |
| #3 | T0NK4 C4T | 49% | 93 |
| #4 | allu | 42% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Donnie | 51% | 74 |
| #2 | UrMomGay | 50% | 222 |
| #3 | T0NK4 C4T | 49% | 93 |
| #4 | allu | 42% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | allu | 41 | 0.0275 |
| #2 | UrMomGay | 36 | 0.0087 |
| #3 | T0NK4 C4T | 23 | 0.0132 |
| #4 | Donnie | 16 | 0.0106 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | UrMomGay | 573 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #2 | allu | 174 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #3 | Donnie | 137 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | T0NK4 C4T | 94 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Donnie | +0.99 | 65 | 46 |
| #2 | laa laa | +0.10 | 65 | 44 |
| #3 | UrMomGay | -0.09 | 63 | 53 |
| #4 | allu | -0.10 | 43 | 45 |
| #5 | T0NK4 C4T | -0.72 | 43 | 43 |





