








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1312 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 553 matches | ||
| Faceit | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 26 matches | ||
| Wingman | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




55 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7420 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,779 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4637 | 23% |
| Smokes | 4160 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 5393 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 5589 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,435,447 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4092 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | gorol | 49% | 167 |
| #6 | Kapitan | 48% | 538 |
| #7 | Patryko96 | 48% | 443 |
| #8 | Kisioj | 48% | 356 |
| #9 | Noname. | 48% | 387 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zaNda | 23 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | Kapitan | 18 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Patryko96 | 15 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Kisioj | 13 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | gorol | 5 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zaNda | 2200 | 0.20 | 64 min |
| #2 | Patryko96 | 1899 | 0.20 | 51 min |
| #3 | Kapitan | 1428 | 0.12 | 36 min |
| #4 | Kisioj | 1171 | 0.16 | 31 min |
| #5 | gorol | 608 | 0.16 | 18 min |





