








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 298 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
633 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 940 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 472 | 50% |
| Smokes | 110 | 12% |
| HE Grenades | 320 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 38 | 4% |
Our logs show you have wasted $350,424 of utility $231 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 32 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AnoniMouse | 59% | 17 |
| #2 | expo | 52% | 33 |
| #3 | Firehawk | 50% | 22 |
| #4 | puppygirl ❤ | 47% | 17 |
| #5 | Zyuwu | 14% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | expo | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | Firehawk | 1 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | expo | 159 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| #2 | puppygirl ❤ | 66 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #3 | Zyuwu | 51 | 0.34 | 2 min |
| #4 | AnoniMouse | 36 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | Firehawk | 28 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | expo | +6.63 | 79 | 69 |
| #2 | JustLaben | +0.14 | 78 | 44 |
| #3 | Zyuwu | +0.11 | 62 | 73 |
| #4 | Firehawk | -0.72 | 57 | 37 |
| #5 | puppygirl ❤ | -1.46 | 54 | 52 |





