








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 986 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 97 matches | ||
| Premier | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




45 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3499 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,460 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3876 | 31% |
| Smokes | 2859 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3336 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2389 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $798,694 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 673 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | UNIQUE4K | 63% | 32 |
| #2 | Gold #SkinsMonkey | 57% | 40 |
| #3 | J' | 56% | 27 |
| #4 | Sparkster | 53% | 15 |
| #5 | Tywah | 53% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | 5H0T5 | 53% | 19 |
| #7 | Bu11si | 52% | 21 |
| #8 | L1LM0NEY | 52% | 31 |
| #9 | L'Washa | 48% | 31 |
| #10 | Kelly | 44% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gold #SkinsMonkey | 8 | 0.0094 |
| #2 | L'Washa | 7 | 0.0113 |
| #3 | UNIQUE4K | 5 | 0.0075 |
| #4 | Tywah | 5 | 0.0080 |
| #5 | L1LM0NEY | 2 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tywah | 113 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #2 | UNIQUE4K | 97 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #3 | J' | 93 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #4 | L'Washa | 78 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | Sparkster | 58 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | UNIQUE4K | +5.36 | 88 | 70 |
| #2 | Tywah | +3.34 | 78 | 51 |
| #3 | Torch | +1.76 | 85 | 69 |
| #4 | J' | +1.07 | 78 | 65 |
| #5 | 5H0T5 | +0.87 | 67 | 62 |





