








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 12 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 166 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 123 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 114 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 68 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




96 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5825 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,093 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3231 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3185 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1953 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 3724 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,784,760 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 574 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RpM ^v^ | 59% | 34 |
| #2 | ThunderdomeXtreme | 52% | 69 |
| #3 | dragonalilly | 49% | 53 |
| #4 | bORB | 48% | 138 |
| #5 | Dex™ | 47% | 93 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Loki Fire | 45% | 189 |
| #8 | DabCat.Dior | 42% | 55 |
| #9 | Jooby {Controller} | 37% | 35 |
| #10 | Jenna Tolls | 36% | 33 |
| #11 | null | 34% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ThunderdomeXtreme | 27 | 0.0206 |
| #2 | RD Sniper | 26 | 0.0119 |
| #3 | bORB | 23 | 0.0082 |
| #4 | Dex™ | 12 | 0.0068 |
| #5 | DabCat.Dior | 8 | 0.0067 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dex™ | 584 | 0.33 | 14 min |
| #2 | bORB | 339 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #3 | Loki Fire | 300 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #4 | RD Sniper | 256 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #5 | ThunderdomeXtreme | 240 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RpM ^v^ | +3.78 | 83 | 57 |
| #2 | RD Sniper | +3.53 | 71 | 50 |
| #3 | ThunderdomeXtreme | +2.01 | 78 | 54 |
| #4 | DabCat.Dior | +1.48 | 75 | 53 |
| #5 | ADrxgon | +1.36 | 80 | 51 |





