








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 12 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 206 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 142 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 97 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 32 matches | ||
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




52 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8842 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 28,607 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8692 | 30% |
| Smokes | 6402 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 8442 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 5071 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,131,249 of utility $70 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 208 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chrs | 69% | 67 |
| #2 | Courier | 61% | 158 |
| #3 | CmA♕ | 60% | 179 |
| #4 | Bubs | 53% | 270 |
| #5 | bungis | 52% | 97 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | jawnii | 49% | 63 |
| #9 | Ranch Dubois | 49% | 43 |
| #10 | ✪ Bruhdy | 46% | 335 |
| #11 | ⚜︎ XyMcFly | 45% | 118 |
| #12 | joshiiwa | 44% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Demon | 72 | 0.0120 |
| #2 | ✪ Bruhdy | 41 | 0.0059 |
| #3 | CmA♕ | 29 | 0.0079 |
| #4 | bungis | 25 | 0.0132 |
| #5 | chrs | 23 | 0.0170 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Bruhdy | 1518 | 0.22 | 42 min |
| #2 | Demon | 882 | 0.15 | 25 min |
| #3 | Bubs | 650 | 0.12 | 20 min |
| #4 | CmA♕ | 385 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #5 | ⚜︎ XyMcFly | 253 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chrs | +2.61 | 77 | 31 |
| #2 | Demon | +1.60 | 77 | 63 |
| #3 | Bubs | +1.58 | 75 | 70 |
| #4 | CmA♕ | +1.24 | 86 | 51 |
| #5 | 🏹 plxw | +0.90 | 79 | 64 |





