








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 111 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1368 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,534 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1327 | 38% |
| Smokes | 725 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 477 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 1005 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $453,968 of utility $155 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | birdUP | 63% | 8 |
| #2 | CfH | 60% | 35 |
| #3 | Oski | 60% | 75 |
| #4 | Dooms Day | 51% | 73 |
| #5 | Deathray2 | 50% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Blinkie | 49% | 105 |
| #7 | LeDon Gibroni | 48% | 87 |
| #8 | joker | 48% | 81 |
| #9 | sneeZ3 | 42% | 36 |
| #10 | c!nd3r | 33% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Blinkie | 6 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | LeDon Gibroni | 5 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | joker | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | Dooms Day | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | Oski | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Blinkie | 525 | 0.24 | 13 min |
| #2 | joker | 448 | 0.26 | 12 min |
| #3 | Oski | 232 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #4 | Dooms Day | 189 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #5 | LeDon Gibroni | 171 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | birdUP | +2.90 | 84 | 52 |
| #2 | joker | +2.04 | 88 | 79 |
| #3 | Deathray2 | +1.72 | 52 | 55 |
| #4 | Scahh | +0.49 | 76 | 65 |
| #5 | Oski | +0.33 | 70 | 64 |





