








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 230 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 120 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1936 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,433 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2195 | 21% |
| Smokes | 3420 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 2530 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2288 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $759,006 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 8 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | joker | 53% | 80 |
| #2 | Oski | 51% | 143 |
| #3 | Scahh | 51% | 73 |
| #4 | CfH | 48% | 109 |
| #5 | Blinkie | 46% | 160 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | LeDon Gibroni | 44% | 109 |
| #8 | BAECHU | 44% | 16 |
| #9 | birdUP | 37% | 19 |
| #10 | Kush | 37% | 30 |
| #11 | c!nd3r | 36% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Blinkie | 7 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | LeDon Gibroni | 5 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | c!nd3r | 5 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | sneeZ3 | 4 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | joker | 4 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Blinkie | 634 | 0.19 | 17 min |
| #2 | joker | 409 | 0.25 | 10 min |
| #3 | Oski | 387 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #4 | LeDon Gibroni | 217 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #5 | sneeZ3 | 193 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | joker | +2.26 | 88 | 75 |
| #2 | Oski | +1.54 | 69 | 65 |
| #3 | Scahh | +1.11 | 78 | 65 |
| #4 | LeDon Gibroni | +0.33 | 72 | 52 |
| #5 | sneeZ3 | +0.26 | 52 | 61 |





