










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 39 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 5 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
124 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 527 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 190 | 36% |
| Smokes | 121 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 122 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 94 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $52,175 of utility $159 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 7 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pXtatX | 83% | 6 |
| #2 | M4THI45 | 78% | 9 |
| #3 | CASCADE | 69% | 13 |
| #4 | Sniperknight | 64% | 14 |
| #5 | twix | 60% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | M4THI45 | 78% | 9 |
| #3 | CASCADE | 69% | 13 |
| #4 | Sniperknight | 64% | 14 |
| #5 | twix | 60% | 15 |
| #6 | Luremus | 50% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | twix | 5 | 0.0168 |
| #2 | pXtatX | 5 | 0.0446 |
| #3 | CASCADE | 4 | 0.0159 |
| #4 | M4THI45 | 1 | 0.0058 |
| #5 | Luremus | 1 | 0.0088 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CASCADE | 67 | 0.27 | 2 min |
| #2 | twix | 39 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #3 | Sniperknight | 33 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #4 | pXtatX | 29 | 0.26 | 1 min |
| #5 | M4THI45 | 22 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CASCADE | +2.53 | 86 | 66 |
| #2 | M4THI45 | +2.52 | 70 | 54 |
| #3 | pXtatX | +2.24 | 49 | 60 |
| #4 | soppa™˙ᵕ˙ | +1.32 | 87 | 66 |
| #5 | twix | +1.30 | 86 | 58 |





