








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1151 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 41 matches | ||
| Premier | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Esplay | 1 match | 2,035 | |
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2925 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,309 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2422 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1810 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2065 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2012 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $752,455 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 418 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pXtatX | 67% | 54 |
| #2 | soppa™˙ᵕ˙ | 60% | 15 |
| #3 | M4THI45 | 58% | 161 |
| #4 | Sniperknight | 58% | 161 |
| #5 | Luremus | 54% | 89 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | soppa™˙ᵕ˙ | 60% | 15 |
| #3 | M4THI45 | 58% | 161 |
| #4 | Sniperknight | 58% | 161 |
| #5 | Luremus | 54% | 89 |
| #6 | CASCADE | 54% | 93 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CASCADE | 31 | 0.0171 |
| #2 | M4THI45 | 21 | 0.0065 |
| #3 | pXtatX | 20 | 0.0192 |
| #4 | Luremus | 4 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | Sniperknight | 3 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M4THI45 | 462 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #2 | CASCADE | 460 | 0.25 | 11 min |
| #3 | Sniperknight | 428 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #4 | pXtatX | 280 | 0.27 | 6 min |
| #5 | Luremus | 164 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M4THI45 | +2.05 | 72 | 59 |
| #2 | twix | +2.05 | 84 | 62 |
| #3 | CASCADE | +1.51 | 86 | 59 |
| #4 | pXtatX | +1.22 | 56 | 72 |
| #5 | soppa™˙ᵕ˙ | +1.19 | 87 | 67 |





