








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 262 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 84 matches | ||
| Faceit | 47 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2149 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,257 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 818 | 19% |
| Smokes | 1098 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 856 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1485 | 35% |
Our logs show you have wasted $734,607 of utility $194 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 227 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | m | 81% | 16 |
| #2 | Nisse | 66% | 65 |
| #3 | Fatima | 63% | 75 |
| #4 | dempa | 60% | 45 |
| #5 | ProXXi | 60% | 119 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | dempa | 60% | 45 |
| #5 | ProXXi | 60% | 119 |
| #6 | Slamala | 59% | 137 |
| #7 | m | 50% | 10 |
| #8 | ✪sh1fter | 41% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Slamala | 10 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | Fatima | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Nisse | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | ProXXi | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #5 | dempa | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ProXXi | 413 | 0.17 | 14 min |
| #2 | Slamala | 295 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #3 | Fatima | 104 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #4 | Nisse | 79 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | m | 52 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | m | +3.53 | 71 | 62 |
| #2 | CyZiK | +2.65 | 86 | 58 |
| #3 | ProXXi | +2.57 | 90 | 74 |
| #4 | m | +2.47 | 89 | 52 |
| #5 | Nisse | -0.05 | 70 | 58 |





