








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 386 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 103 matches | ||
| Faceit | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




73 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1832 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,986 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1741 | 35% |
| Smokes | 579 | 12% |
| HE Grenades | 1358 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1308 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,050,054 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 203 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jello | 62% | 21 |
| #2 | Frost_276 | 58% | 64 |
| #3 | riaN | 56% | 165 |
| #4 | woNg | 52% | 217 |
| #5 | RealLyfeMafiaBoss | 51% | 237 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | riaN | 75 | 0.0220 |
| #2 | RealLyfeMafiaBoss | 65 | 0.0134 |
| #3 | woNg | 28 | 0.0063 |
| #4 | kaelin | 25 | 0.0074 |
| #5 | Frost_276 | 12 | 0.0096 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | riaN | 759 | 0.22 | 21 min |
| #2 | woNg | 406 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #3 | RealLyfeMafiaBoss | 314 | 0.06 | 8 min |
| #4 | ElviNas | 292 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #5 | kaelin | 262 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | riaN | +5.19 | 78 | 71 |
| #2 | RealLyfeMafiaBoss | +2.83 | 76 | 39 |
| #3 | woNg | +2.45 | 75 | 52 |
| #4 | jello | +1.32 | 52 | 35 |
| #5 | kaelin | +0.13 | 74 | 49 |





