








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 502 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 94 matches | ||
| Faceit | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3214 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,112 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1827 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1654 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2080 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2551 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $692,923 of utility $122 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 368 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jello | 68% | 38 |
| #2 | riaN | 59% | 160 |
| #3 | Frost_276 | 56% | 52 |
| #4 | RealLyfeMafiaBoss | 55% | 191 |
| #5 | kaelin | 52% | 120 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | RealLyfeMafiaBoss | 55% | 191 |
| #5 | kaelin | 52% | 120 |
| #6 | CallMeVenus | 52% | 217 |
| #7 | ElviNas | 50% | 119 |
| #8 | RealLyfeMafiaBoss | 48% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | riaN | 67 | 0.0207 |
| #2 | CallMeVenus | 53 | 0.0120 |
| #3 | RealLyfeMafiaBoss | 45 | 0.0116 |
| #4 | kaelin | 17 | 0.0068 |
| #5 | RealLyfeMafiaBoss | 12 | 0.0095 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | riaN | 692 | 0.21 | 19 min |
| #2 | CallMeVenus | 432 | 0.10 | 12 min |
| #3 | ElviNas | 311 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #4 | RealLyfeMafiaBoss | 244 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #5 | kaelin | 168 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | riaN | +4.93 | 79 | 73 |
| #2 | RealLyfeMafiaBoss | +2.76 | 76 | 42 |
| #3 | woNg | +2.31 | 76 | 51 |
| #4 | jello | +0.14 | 55 | 34 |
| #5 | kaelin | -0.78 | 72 | 49 |





